My esteemed colleague Edward Copeland is still soliciting ballots for his poll to determine the worst best picture winners of all time. Here is my ballot, ranked in order from 1 to 10, with 1 being the worst.
1. "Crash" (2005) Anything but this.
2. "Around the World in 80 Days." (1956) A deal memo in Technicolor.
3. "The Greatest Show on Earth." (1952) Makes the circus seem boring.
4. "Gentleman's Agreement." (1946) Feh.
5. "Grand Hotel." (1931/32) Lumpy porridge.
6. "All the King's Men." (1949) A ninth grade term paper on Southern political corruption, read aloud by professional actors.
7. "A Beautiful Mind." (2001) Quite bad. Somehow its innate belief in its own decency makes it worse.
8. "Going My Way." (1944) A quivering slab of raw heart, lightly glazed with banter.
9. "Rain Man." (1988) Piercing and lovely for the first hour. Then they go to Vegas and it turns into just another gleaming, shitty '80s movie.
10. "Gladiator." (2000) Aspires to be "Spartacus" by way of "The Godfather," but its production values, moral intelligence and strong cast can't overcome a certain trash-and-flash factor. Ridley Scott directed it, but brother Tony's spirit hovers nearby.
Qualifiers: I have never seen "Cavalcade" or "The Broadway Melody."
The final deadline is March 31. For a list of previous best picture Oscar winners, click here. In the interests of promoting a safe and secure democracy, Mr. Copeland asks that you email your 10 ranked choices directly to him, at email@example.com.