Here’s more expertly-made trash from director Rob Cohen. Anarchist stuntman Xander Cage (Vin Diesel) gives it to the Man via carjackings and video projection. NSA Agent Gibbons (Samuel L. Jackson) soon comes a knockin’, pitting Cage (alias xXx, see the tattoos on the back of his neck) against the Euro Trash Anarchy 99 contingency hellbent on spraying the world with the lethal Silent Night poison (don’t ask). Before xXx makes it to the Czech Republic, though, he must prove his worth by disengaging the enemy through a series of training scenarios (one at a local diner, another in the Colombian jungle). Key here is the Rich Wilkes screenplay, a proudly unpretentious crass-job ripe with one-liners tailor-made for a nü-Schwarzenegger and one that calls expert attention to the authenticity of the film’s settings by toying with Hollywood representations of foreign cultures. xXx’s introduction to the Colombian cocaine trade comes courtesy of a young native boy who seemingly raps a warning to his father (“Papa, papa, Gringos alla!”) while Marton Csokas keeps the Czech club world in check with his delicious broken English. Jackson, all the while, mixes metaphors as the constantly grinning game show host. From Asia Argento’s Russian hottie Yelena to Orbital’s Czech techno, xXx reimagines James Bond for the Playstation crowd. xXx’s self-knowingness may seem especially redundant after Austin Powers in Goldmember, but this beast of a film is about as eager-to-please as it is pretense-free.
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