Review: Dickie Roberts: Former Child Star

There’s potential here for potent Hollywood ribbing, but Dickie Roberts mostly plays like an E! True Hollywood Story.

Dickie Roberts: Former Child Star
Photo: Paramount Pictures

A star vehicle for SNL alum David Spade, Dickie Roberts: Former Child Star looks to shed light on the child actor syndrome that has produced many victims but very few survivors. The titular has-been actor played by Spade was the star of the fictional ’70s sitcom The Glimmer Gang, which had him playing a wise-cracking tyke (essentially Dennis the Menace by way of Macaulay Culkin) whose famous catchphrase was “Nucking Futs.” (The film’s timing couldn’t be any more serendipitous, opening the same week as Party Monster, which resuscitates Culkin from a nine-year acting hiatus as gay club killer Michael Alig.)

Dickie Roberts catalogs its protagonist’s attempts to recreate his childhood at the request of Rob Reiner in an elaborate attempt to land a part in the director’s hot new project. (Apparently Dickie hasn’t seen Alex and Emma.) There’s potential here for potent Hollywood ribbing, but Dickie Roberts mostly plays like an E! True Hollywood Story, meaning it’s as self-conscious as it is vanilla. The lame special appearances by endless former child stars seemingly exist to please the nostalgia wanker. Danny Bonaduce, Corey Feldman, and Dustin Diamond are among Dickie’s poker buddies, and Barry Williams dutifully embarrasses himself by referencing his career highpoint by pulling out the Tiki idol that he once wore on The Brady Bunch.

There are two films at war here: the satire that Spade and ex-SNL writer Fred Wolf want it to be (there are bright spots, including a hysterical and genuinely sweet sequence that gives it to the pop princesses of the world who don’t want to act their age) and the bad TV sitcom facsimile it becomes when Dickie realizes that love is more important than fame. The problem with Dickie Roberts: Former Child Star is that it doesn’t understand (but should) that Emmanuel Lewis kicking the shit out of someone is nowhere near as funny as Emmanuel Lewis himself. Dickie wants the second coming John Travolta made for himself but doesn’t realize that maybe Look Who’s Talking should have put Travolta out of commission for good.

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Score: 
 Cast: David Spade, Ashley Edner, Scott Terra, Willie Aames, Craig Bierko, Danny Bonaduce, Jenna Boyd, Rachel Dratch, Jeff Chase, Corey Feldman, Dustin Diamond, Emmanuel Lewis, Leif Garrett, Jon Lovitz, Edie McClurg  Director: Sam Weisman  Screenwriter: David Spade, Fred Wolf  Distributor: Paramount Pictures  Running Time: 98 min  Rating: PG-13  Year: 2003  Buy: Video, Soundtrack

Ed Gonzalez

Ed Gonzalez is the co-founder of Slant Magazine. A member of the New York Film Critics Circle, his writing has appeared in The Village Voice, The Los Angeles Times, and other publications.

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